Wednesday, November 29

Cruising the Town

I guess it's a sure sign that you work in an industrial park when you see forklifts driving down the road, and don't even find it to be an unusual sight.

Tuesday, November 28

Redicularity

Nursery rhymes are pretty silly things. But some go above and beyond. Shannon and I have a running debate on whether or not Patty-Cake involves "throwing up high" or not. It seems to me that any throwing up high of cake batter would get messy in a hurry. Then there is a bizarre one involving riding a "cock horse". I just make up words to that one.

But one of the all time weird things hidden in Nursery rhymes has to go to the Little Piggy/toe rhyme. It seems somewhat plausible at first. One goes to market, and the next stays home. Nursery rhymes are thick with people prancing off to the market through the woods to go fetch something or other. But then, out of the blue, here comes "This little piggy had roast beef". Roast Beef?!?! Of all the possible things in the whole wide world, how did roast beef get chosen? What is a pig doing eating roast beef? I just don't get it!

Left in the Dark

Welcome back from a long Thanksgiving break. It was lots of fun. We partied in SLC, had our first Black Friday shopping experience, watched a thrilling football game, and drove like mad people to get back to St. George in time for the Amazing Race. As predicted, internet access was a bit harder to come by, so you missed out on the blogs. But, if you were like me, you were busy enough with other things that you didn't really miss it. But on to today's important topic:

There are no light switches in the clean room. We've got 2 clean rooms here at work, and neither one has a light switch in it. It's actually not a bad idea not to put light switches in the clean room. The switches should be outside the room, so you flip them on before going in and, more importantly, you can still flip them off once you're outside the clean room without dressing back up in your bunny suit. As an aside, bathrooms should have the light switches inside the room, but Shannon's parents house apparently doesn't know that. Anyway, the most peculiar thing about the clean rooms here is that there are no light switches. Period. No where, anywhere, is there a switch on the wall that turns the lights on and off. Millions of dollars we spent on the place and no light switches. We just flip the breakers on and off for the lights. I suppose that in the long run, the clean room is supposed to be running 24/7, so the lights will never need to be off. But still . . . .

Wednesday, November 22

Suzanne Sightings!

Despite my sisters constant claims, she is apparently not the youngest Suzanne in the whole world. It turns out that Alex's husband's sister is named Suzanne and comes in at a spry young age of 25.

In other news, Thanksgiving approaches and my internet access will not be quite so ubiquitous, so you could see a decrease in posts while we're all busy stuffing ourselves with turkey. But, since half of my readers will be moving into the old Sandy home, you'll still get your fill of me. Those of you in TX and OK will just have to find something else to keep you entertained.

Tuesday, November 21

It's like it's trying to speak to me.

While out driving, Shannon and I saw a license plate:
GRDCNPT
If you have any ideas as to what this could possibly mean, we'd love to hear them.

LEARN ALGEBRA!

About a year ago, someone wrote an article in the NYT (I think) about how Algebra was useless. As you might guess, I disagree. Nay, I strongly disagree. Anyway, along comes Suzanne wondering how a little party trick works, and suddenly, here comes Algebra with the solution! I'll first list the trick:

YOUR AGE BY DINER & RESTAURANT MATH

This is pretty neat. Don't cheat by scrolling down first! It takes less than a minute. Work this out as you read; be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat. (more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)
3. Add 5
4. Multiply it by 50
5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1756 . If you haven't, add 1755.
6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.You should have a three digit number.

The first digit of this was your original number ( i.e., how many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week.) The next two digits are your age! 2006 is the only year it will ever work!

And now, because this is algebra (which everyone should know) not magic, I will reveal the trick. It's good to do it with a real number so you can see how it works, but because we want to show why it works, we use algebra's favorite number: x.

1. Start with:
x
2. Multiply by 2:
2x
3. Add five:
2x+5
4. Multiply it by 50:
(2x+5)*50
These last two steps are to confuse you so you can't see what's going on. Let's simplify to clear that up:
100x+250
5. Now add either 1756 or 1755. Since we're late in the year, we'll use 1756
100x+250+1756 = 100x + 2006
Hmmm . . . now we can see why this trick will only work this year. This step just makes sure that the number you're adding is the year you had your last birthday in. The trick will work just fine next year, you'll just have to add one more.
6. Subtract the year you were born.
100x + (2006 - 1982) = 100x + 24 = x00 +24 = x24
I put in my year of birth, just for a firm number. Of course, 2006-1982 is my age. The 100x (remember that x is how often you want to eat out) pushes the value x out to the hundreds place where it won't interfere with the calculation of your age. Of course, don't try this trick on anyone 100 years old or older!

Perhaps Suzanne owes me my dollar back?

Sunday, November 19

Hot Zippity!

The next time you are entertaining guests, make them some Hot Zippity Tomato Dill Drink! Here's the recipe (from the Lion House Recipes book).

Ingredients:
1 can (46 ounces) tomato juice
4 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon garlic salt
2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
3 dashes Tabasco sauce
1/2 cup dill pickle juice
1/3 cup lemon juice

Combine all ingredients in saucepan. Bring mixture to a boil. Let stand awhile to develop flavors. Taste to correct seasonings. Beverage may be served hot or cold. Garnish with chopped chives or a dollop of sour cream, if desired. Makes 7 cups, about 12 servings.

I can't even think of where to begin, so I'll just let this recipe speak for itself.

Friday, November 17

You know you've got an interesting job when you're working and suddenly you realize: "hmmm . . . I've only got 2 pairs of gloves on, that's probably not enough." So then you take off the outer pair, and put on two more to bring the total up to three.

Exciting chemical reaction for the day: (Never, never, never try this one at home.) Add 50-100 mL of room temperature HF to a piece of room temperature Ge. Wait 20 seconds. Suddenly, the HF is boiling vigorously and is REALLY HOT!

Again, I can't even begin to emphasize how you shouldn't even think about doing this in real life. (Unless you're a professional, like me.) (But again, I'm not kidding about those warnings.)

Inspired by Suzanne

My competing list. I'd tell you to guess what it's a list of, but the odd of you not having read Suzanne's blog is so minuscule that I won't bother.
  • Hard hat
  • 5 brown paper bags
  • 3 Jolly Ranchers
  • Safety Glasses
  • 2 apples (shhhh! Don't tell Shanny)
  • Styrofoam cup
  • "Curious finger" of Germanium
  • Spoon

Wednesday, November 15

So relaxing . . .

Today I have discovered that work is much more enjoyable when you can relax on the beach and listen to the waves crashing on the rocks down shore.

A few days ago we discovered that our dumpster here at work had been filled with someone's crap. An ironing board, a baby stroller, boxes of crud. I haven't been out to look, but that's what they tell me. Well, I guess Stuart was taking inventory of how much stuff was out there, when he discovered a working soothing noise machine. So now in the office we can listen to ocean, brook, rain, heartbeat and a few other options.

Now I'm looking for a little contraption so I can feel the warm sand between my toes.

Tuesday, November 14

Sleeping with the Fishes

Charles "Charlie" Fish Blockburger died last night. This news was first reported in an article on Shanny's Life. Reports indicate that he was found dead when the owners went to feed him Monday evening at about 10pm. Little is known about Charles' life before he was found at Petsmart at a young age on Valentines Day, 2004. Since then he has lived in Provo, Sandy and St. George. He is survived by two owners. Services for Charles were held in the main bathroom of the Blockburger home. In lieu of flowers, please make donations to the Charlie Blockburger memorial fund. For details, leave a message on this blog.

Monday, November 13

I wish I was making this up

Is the type and extent of control applied to the Supplier and the purchased product dependent upon the effect of the purchased product on subsequent product realization or the final product?
And I thought that if I went into science and not lawyerness that I could avoid terrible things like this. But no, this is what I get to spend half of the week learning the answers to.

Edited to add: I'll give a dollar to anyone who can diagram that question.

Thursday, November 9

Top Gun

Old companies usually have old stuff floating around that has been stuffed into nooks and crannies over the years. As a new company, you'd think we'd have less of that stuff. But no, we've got it all the same, because we've got things that we've bought from old companies who have off loaded their stuff onto us. Today's jems were some hardhats that were delivered to Jason and I. They're probably from the construction process here, but now I've got one sitting on my desk, as does Jason. He decided to put his name on his, or rather, he decided to name himself "Maverick". As his dutiful sidekick, my hard hat is now labeled "Goose". I guess that makes Shannon Meg Ryan.

The Hot Zone

A few years ago when Nate, Brett and I lived together in Provo, we were warm blooded enough that we just never turned on the heat as the temperatures cooled off in the fall. Eventually,l of course, it turned into some sort of macho contest with ourselves as we took pride in being "tough guys" or something of that sort. Shannon and Sabrina would come down to see us and would complain that they were freezing. They'd keep wearing their coats even inside our apartment. Eventually they forced us to turn on the heat somewhere in mid-November.

Fast forward to the present. A few weeks ago (late October) I merely mentioned to Shannon that we'd have to fire up the heat soon. The response? "Why would you want to do a terrible thing like that?"

We still haven't turned on the heat.

Monday, November 6

Check and Mate

One of the unfortunate parts of moving is that you have to get new checks. I guess maybe you don't, since it's been years since I last heard the formerly ubiquitous question, "Is everything current?", but anyway, it seems that getting new checks is just one of those things that goes along with moving. When we got married, Shannon and I settled upon using her existing accounts with Washington Mutual. My name was added to her checks and we had checks proudly declaring:
Shannon Anderson Blockburger
Clark Blockburger
We needed new checks upon moving to St. George, so Shannon called them up to get our new address on them, and they very promptly (and freely) delivered our checks for:
Shannon Anderson Blockburger
Had I been disowned? Shannon called them up to correct them, and they made it seem like they were doing a great service to give her more checks for free, even though they're always free and they were the ones that decided to delete me from existence. She said, "I want my husbands name on the checks, too." "Charles?" "No, Clark" "Right." We were half expecting checks for Charles Blockburger (incidentally, that's my Grandfather's name) to show up, but instead we got (this is their actual formatting):
Shannon Anderson Blockburger
Clark Blockburger
Never before has my name looked to puny. Evidently they've been forced to admit I exist, but that doesn't mean they'll choose to elevate me above the status of a peasant any time soon.

This is why you get no bloggings

I come up with all sorts of neat things to blog about every single day. And most of them are long forgotten by the time I get to a computer. Especially on the weekends.

However, I am announcing a late night chat/interview opportunity with yours truly for the next two evenings! I'll be pulling the 6pm - 5am shift at work and I'll get pretty lonely (and tired). So if you have insomnia problems, drop me a line!

Thursday, November 2

Fair Weather Friends

A visitor to the plant, and a new friend we made out hiking.

But you can call me . . .

I just got too much of a giggle out of Mark's comment to the last post not to write something about it. Mark's brother's nickname from back in the day was Bun. It makes me laugh just to type it out. (It also kinda reminds me of Mr. Bun, Suzie Derkins stuffed rabbit.) I don't really know how we got away with calling him that for all those years. So here is a further list of nicknames that I find quite ridiculous and which make me giggle. Feel free to add your own, though maybe I'll ask Shannon not to embarrass me too much.

My names: Pants (short for Clarky Pants), Ball, Clarm, Cloark (apparently Alex still uses this one all the time), Eagle Eye, Boy, Flu-Boy-Lump-Head

Shannon: ShannyBoo, Boo, Cave Fish Eye (she came up with that one herself)

Other People: Long Arms Millar (Brett), Disc (Sabrina), _7, (Sabrina), Oaf (Mark), Bun (Eric)

Grand Prize Winners: I almost feel bad to put these ones up here, but when you put it on your blog for the whole world to see, you're just asking for it. The prize goes to Alex and Ben whose names for each other are Booboo and Poopy.

Wednesday, November 1

Vegetables are your friends.

Eat your friends.

This week I learned that Alex is not a particularly big fan of vegetables. And it's started me thinking about that. I like most all vegetables. Shannon has a few very stong dislikes and a larger list of things that she's not real wild about. DO NOT try to feed her a pickle, or iceberg lettuce. Bad Things will happen. Then I thought about Sabrina not liking varous veges. And my sister Suzanne. And I've realized, I don't know of any guys that have wide spread vegetable dislikes. Brett doesn't like asparagus, but other than that most guys I know will eat their vegetables. Does this seem suprising to anyone else? I realize that my sample size is pretty small here, so you can help me out with it, but are girls the vegetable haters in the world?